Never Shall They Say You Are Lower Than Dirt

If your loved ones respect you, they shouldn’t put you down.

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Choose Cremation

Don’t give your body to nature (too many people were before you).

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Can’t Decide On A Setting?

It’s quite alright for a girl’s best friend to be loose.

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Have A Heart In Diamond

A girl’s best friend shouldn’t be heartless.

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Fifty Years From Now

What will be more common–the fear of being buried while alive or the fear of being buried while dead?

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Wear A Diamond With Your Soulmate’s Carbon

Fire the little devil on your left shoulder and let the little angel on your right one retire.

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People Are Becoming Diamonds

Now, a girl can be a diamond’s best friend.

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Scatter Seeds Not Ashes

So plants and diamonds can grow.

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Admit It

Getting a mined diamond after a loved one died would make no sense what-so-ever.

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In All Seriousness

Coffins should only be for vampires (and even they get cremated by sunlight).

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